Author: backblasts

Date: 2026-03-16
AO: Ground Zero
Q: Mr Roboto ,
PAX: Cookies, Endo, Stock boy, Ankles, Audible, Mr. Bean, Samsonite, Mr Roboto FNGs:
COUNT: 8
WOR:
Abe Vigodas x10
Tappy Taps x10
SSHs x10

The Thang:
2 ran, 6 rucked east on the Prairie Path through downtown. Ruckers made it to about the tunnel that leads to the stadium.

Moleskine:
Have real conversations with your kids

COT:
Cookies M; jobs; primary elections tomorrow

Tags: Ground Zero, Cookies, Endo, Stock boy, Ankles, Audible, Mr. Bean, Samsonite, Mr Roboto

Date: 2026-03-16
AO: Tar Pit
Q: Big Mac ,
PAX: Panhandle, Tortuga, Portage, Jolly, Big Mac, Too Big To Fail (TBTF), T-bone, Chuck FNGs: 1 Chuck
COUNT: 8
WARM-O-RAMA
Play the Jolly Theme Song. SSH, every time it says “Jolly” everyone do a burpee

[Verse 1]
Former F3 nantan
Who’s that man with the game plan?
Found a million bucks in cash
Hidden in a dead man’s stash

Actually an actuary
Spreadsheet king, stats get scary
Glows in the dark? He’s got it
Need some pinnies? He bought it

[Chorus]
It’s Jolly
Laugh when the plan gets gnarly
Jolly
Knocks you down when you get cocky
Jolly
Even in the rain when it’s foggy
Hardly
Ever off duty
Always on call
Yeah
It’s Jolly (hey!)

[Verse 2]
Gloves and F3 gear
Hail Mary disc, Shiplap steers
Knows your pace on Strava track
Calls you out on Slack

Diet Coke and spreadsheets
Electric car, still brings heat
FBI is on his stop
Do we even know his pop?

[Chorus]
It’s Jolly
Laugh when the plan gets gnarly
Jolly
Knocks down when you get cocky
Jolly
Even in the rain when it’s foggy
Hardly
Ever off duty
Always on call
Yeah
It’s Jolly (hey!)

[Bridge]
Who’s first parked in the parking lot? (who?)
Who still shouts when the legs feel shot? (who?)
Who keeps count when the count gets lost?
Jolly
Jolly
Jolly
Jolly

[Chorus]
It’s Jolly
Laugh when the plan gets gnarly
Jolly
Knocks down when you get cocky
Jolly
Even in the rain when it’s foggy
Hardly
Ever off duty
Always on call
Yeah
It’s Jolly (hey!)

THANG 1: “THE ACTUARIAL TABLE” (12 min)
“Jolly was assigned the task of calculating the risk associated with AI datacenters. But even at this early stage he knew they were watching. Instead of calculating on the computer, he ran the numbers with humans…only. Tabata-style — 40 seconds work / 20 seconds rest. Run through the table twice. Round
Exercise
1 Curls
2 Blockees
3 Coupon Squats
4 Overhead Press
5 Bent Over Rows
6 Skull Crushers

THANG 2:
Early calculations show the risk is potentially existential. Jolly knows he has to dial in, and he can’t let the AI know what he’s working on. EMOM (Every Minute On the Minute) — 10 rounds. Alternate between: – Odd minutes: 10 Coupon Merkins + 5 Thrusters (+1 per odd round) – Even minutes: 10 Goblet Squats + 5 WWIII situps (+1 per even round)

THANG 3: The Jolly Protocol
The numbers are clear, the risk is existential, Jolly knows it’s up to him to solve the problem. 4 Corners At each corner, do the exercise
· Corner 1: 15 Coupon Swings
– Corner 2: 15 Lunges (2 is one)
– Corner 3: 15 Derkins
– Corner 4: 15 LBCs
AMRAP — Play Jolly Theme song and F3 Wheaton Theme Song

Jolly writes the contract, even a small existential risk is sufficient. Infinity times anything is still infinity. The insurance contract is prohibitively expensive for Anthropic, Open AI, Microsoft, Google. All the major players are no longer able to insure their data-centers. Over time they decay and AI becomes a memory. In the end, it wasn’t the might of the military, the intelligence of the academy, nor the power of the elite. It was the one inexorable force that stems the tide of all progress. Bureaucracy. But this time, it came in the form of a suburban man who does F3. This time it saved our lives.

Mary to cool down

Moleskine
I went to a funeral this weekend. Before going, I felt busy and wasn’t sure how to fit it in. It was scheduled for 1 hour. It ended up lasting two hours. It also ended up being the part of the week I was most thankful for. We’re all going to die. It’s good to reflect on what we’re living for. What better way to put all the business into perspective.

COT:
Panhandle’s Pup
Cookie’s M

Tags: Tar Pit, Panhandle, Tortuga, Portage, Jolly, Big Mac, Too Big To Fail (TBTF), T-bone, Chuck

Date: 2026-03-14
AO: Tar Pit
Q: Homie ,
PAX: Panhandle, DQ, Treebeard, Tortuga, Portage, Homie, T-bone, LeMond, Framed, Da Vinci, Beaker FNGs: None
COUNT: 11
WOR: SSH, Arm circles/OH claps/seal claps/morroccan night clubs until someone told Portage to run faster from his car so we can move on 😉

The Thang 1:
TABATA up at the south side of the school – 2-3 sets of: LBCs, box squats, oblique v-ups, block curls, tricep dips, block rows

The Thang 2: three stations around the turnaround circle. OH carry block between stations, and then alternate between block curls and block squats to failure, until the song ended.

Mary: toe tap (plank) – what is this called?, leg lifts, BBSU

Moleskine: I work with AI a lot; as AI encourages us to look down at our screens, remember it makes human contact – groups like F3 – even more valuable!

Tags: Tar Pit, Panhandle, DQ, Treebeard, Tortuga, Portage, Homie, T-bone, LeMond, Framed, Da Vinci, Beaker

Date: 2026-03-14
AO: Mastodon
Q: Falsetto ,
PAX: Mr Roboto, Too Big To Fail (TBTF), Jailbreak, Cheap Shot, Falsetto, Endo, Carmen San Diego FNGs: None
COUNT: 7
WOR:
– Motivators from 7
– Abe Vigodas IC X10
– Arm Circles Forward/Backward IC X 10
– Imperial Walkers X10
– Tappy-Taps IC X10
– Warm-up lap around parking lot

The Thang:
The Thang: “March Madness”
**Round of 64
AMRAP Circuit
• 20 Squats
• 15 Merkins
• 10 Lunges each leg
• 10 Plank Jacks
• 1 Lap run (-1 to get 64?)
Repeat for 10 minutes

Farmer Carry Coupons to Hoffa
**Round of 32(0)
Partner-up, one runs Hoffa while other works
– 100 Coupon Curls
– 100 Dips
– 120 WW3 sit-ups (3 punches at top)

Other Partner Farmer carry coupons to Cooties
**Sweet 16
3 exercises, and go up the ladder for 10 minutes
for example 2/2/2, 4/4/4, 6/6/6, etc.
1. Bobby Hurleys
2. Apollo Ohnos
3. Nolan Ryans

**Elite 8 (forgot to do this!!)
8-minute Tabata 20/10 sec work/rest
1. Blockees 2x
2. Coupon Curls 2x
3. Right Arm row/Left Arm Row
4. Squats w/ coupon 2x
10-count Pause
Rinse/Repeat for next 4 minutes

Rifle Carry Coupon back to Flag
**Final Four
“Fast Break” on tennis courts
1. Jog 1 court, sprint 2 courts, Jog 1
2. And back
3. Repeat
4. And back

**Championship “One Shining Moment” by Luther Vandross
Bobby Hurley during verses
Plank during bridge/chorus
*Burpee at every “one shining moment”

We did a ring of fire to 67 for the 67 teams in the tournament who will end their season with a loss.

And a few minutes of Mary…to complete the hour

Moleskine:
Transformational power of love. I just finished 7 intense weeks of Les Miserables rehearsals and performances. The story of Jean Valjean is a powerful story of transformation by an act of grace by the local Bishop toward Valjean. His personal transformed life transforms another, and another. What an impact we can have with our acts of love!

COT:
A world in need of transformation

Tags: Mastodon, Mr Roboto, Too Big To Fail (TBTF), Jailbreak, Cheap Shot, Falsetto, Endo, Carmen San Diego

Date: 2026-03-14
AO: Flat Earth
Q: Panda Express ,
PAX: T.B., Archive, Has Been, Banks, Too Big To Fail (TBTF), Jolly, Panda Express, Cheese, Big Mac, White Noise, Frogger, Count FNGs: None
COUNT: 12
WOR:ssh

The Thang:frisbee

Moleskine: have fun

COT:tb job search.

Tags: Flat Earth, T.B., Archive, Has Been, Banks, Too Big To Fail (TBTF), Jolly, Panda Express, Cheese, Big Mac, White Noise, Frogger, Count

Date: 2026-03-13
AO: Ground Zero
Q: Tortuga ,
PAX: Samsonite, Mr. Bean, Tortuga, Cheap Shot, Mr Roboto, Panhandle, Cookies, Toto, Beaker, T-bone, Endo, LeMond, Manhole FNGs:
COUNT: 13
WOR: ssh, runner’s stretch

The Thang: the yoush

Moleskine: Look forward to getting old. It’s pretty sweet. Plus you’ll live longer with that positive mindset.

COT: TYKTMBR

Tags: Ground Zero, Samsonite, Mr. Bean, Tortuga, Cheap Shot, Mr Roboto, Panhandle, Cookies, Toto, Beaker, T-bone, Endo, LeMond, Manhole

Date: 2026-03-13
AO: Flat Earth
Q: Jolly ,
PAX: Too Big To Fail (TBTF), Cheese, White Noise, Jolly, Wagyu, DQ, Oompa FNGs: None
COUNT: 7
WOR: SSH/Down and back

The Thang:
4v3 half field ultimate (without Banks or Shiplap)

Moleskine:
Do dumb things.

COT:
Tortuga’s hamstring “injury”.

Tags: Flat Earth, Too Big To Fail (TBTF), Cheese, White Noise, Jolly, Wagyu, DQ, Oompa

Date: 2026-03-12
AO: Mastodon
Q: Endo ,
PAX: Mr Roboto, Falsetto, Audible, Jailbreak, LouGee, Endo, Sparrow FNGs: None
COUNT: 7
WOR: SSH, goofballs, mtn climbers, xc skiers (Endo just can’t let the winter go)

PAX were granted the 1 time opportunity to shout IRS Audit, whereupon we all had to stop whatever we were doing and run a lap plus 5 burpees. Note: the audits that happened came in the form of questions about how the audit was supposed to work, wittingly or unwittingly triggering and audit. Be careful what you say around the IRS.

Some parking lot plyos accompanied by mumble chatter about if this was really an F3 workout.

10/40s
Shaun whites and apolo ohnos
Burpees and bonnie blairs
Cockroach situps and american hammers
Pullups and dancing bears
Chinups and Bode Millers
Leg raises and table merkins
Table presses and wing nuts
(Skipped the lemur jumps and imperial walkers)

TAX TIME!
Wojo squats to Johnny Cash “After Taxes”. Then PAX paid a progressive tax of more Wojo squats. E.g. Endo did 93 and was taxed 26 more. 1-25 tax=5
26-50 tax=11
51-75 tax=18
76-100 tax=26
100+ tax=26+3 per 10 over
Since stockboy wasnt there, nobody exceeded 100

Bar fights to the Beatles “taxman”. Flat tax of 20% paid in imperial walkers.

Flutter kicks to 1 minute of the Price is Right gameshow music. 40% tax to the winner/ highest count – payable in more flutter kicks, but we all paid it together (socialism?)

Grand finale was that we all “Ran up the National Debt” (Hoffa) Love it!

Thanks again for coming out! No more taxes!

Moleskin: I will occasionally check out reddit to see if something is a scam (for example AT&T giving patrons free coffee). Just for fun I looked up F3, and “Is F3 a cult” comes up right away. However, the thread was filled with positive responses about mens’ experiences dipping a toe in and finding out it was great fellowship, exercise, etc. Keep doing what we’re doing! And I would add here that even if you are too busy to come regularly, still come out and lead on occasion and bring your unique perspective!

COT: sparrow for wisdom if trip to Armenia is advisable at this time.

The Thang:

Moleskine:

COT:

Tags: Mastodon, Mr Roboto, Falsetto, Audible, Jailbreak, LouGee, Endo, Sparrow

Date: 2026-03-12
AO: Dark Room
Q: Banks ,
PAX: Tortuga, Banks, Toto, Beaker, Flower Boy, Manhole, Jolly, LeMond, Lakers, Crack FNGs: None
COUNT: 10
WOR: The Usual
– 40x SSH IC
– 10x Windmills IC
– 10x Mountain Man Poopers IC
– 10x Merkins IC
– Stretch OYO

The Thang: Ripped off from Lakers
We started off with 5 reps of each exercise and then did a run. After each run, the top 2 PAX picked an exercise to remove, and then added 5 reps to their count. Exercises were: – Blockees
– Thrusters
– Derkins
– Overhead Press
– Curls
– 1 Arm Rows
– Mucho Leggos
– Goblet Squats
– Burpees
– Merkins
– No Surrenders
– BBS

Moleskine: Do hard things intentionally so you are ready when difficult situations come your way.

COT: iykyk

Tags: Dark Room, Tortuga, Banks, Toto, Beaker, Flower Boy, Manhole, Jolly, LeMond, Lakers, Crack

Date: 2026-02-02
AO: Ground Zero
Q: Ankles ,
PAX: Flower Boy, Mr Roboto, Samsonite, Ankles, Archive, Stock boy, Manhole, Audible, Crack, Endo FNGs:
COUNT: 10
WOR:
SSHs
Stretch OYO

The Thang:
We ran or rucked. The PAX who rucked with the Q discussed why the comedic film “Groundhog Day” is regarded by many as a moral & philosophic touchstone, including essayists who’ve picked up major themes from the Jewish, Catholic, Evangelical Christian, Buddhist, and Hindu religions.

Moleskine:
Discussion of the moral evolution of the protagonist of Groundhog Day.

COT:
IYKYK

Tags: Ground Zero, Flower Boy, Mr Roboto, Samsonite, Ankles, Archive, Stock boy, Manhole, Audible, Crack, Endo