Date: 2026-08-22
AO: Mastodon
Q: Treebeard ,
PAX: Stock boy, Too Big To Fail (TBTF), Toto, Cheap Shot, Mr Roboto, Dumpster, Samsonite, Bloomer, Treebeard, The wet burrito, Doogie FNGs: 1 Doogie
COUNT: 11
Conditions: Mid 70’s.
WOR: Side Straddle Hops, Abe Vigoda, Tap Taps, Hip Openers, Calf Stretches, and 10 Blockies to celebrate 10 years of war at Troy.
The Thang: A Two Part Excursion
Part I: An Introduction to Homeric Terms — short mosey between different stations (3 sets of 10). – Nostos: Homecoming (Jump Squats)
– Polytropos: Many Twists & Turns (American Hammers)
– Kleos: Undying Fame (Merkins)
Part II: The Rowing Journey — split into partners; one partner had sandbag carry (i.e. supplies of the ship) while other performed farmer carry (oars of the ship). We stopped at many exciting sites as we sailed home from Troy:
– Station 1: Meeting the Cicones at the Playground — “bar fighters” because we drank 2 much and needed to fight the locals.
– Station 2: Lotus Eaters at Cabin Next to Parking Lot — an original F3 move from Treebeard (it’s a variation on asian squats but you use your hands to imitate smoking a joint; joint here is not real but imitating the effects of lotus flower)
– Station 3: Meeting the Cyclops by the Pickleball Court — performed deadbugs to honor that we hid underneath sheep in order to escape the cave. Unfortunately, our dear Odysseus (Treebeard) got feisty and taunted the Cyclops; thus, resulting in some burpees as punishment.
– Station 4: Meeting god of the winds on Incest Island — traveling to the dock, we had a brief respite as Aeolus welcomed us. But then the crew opened the bag of winds and hope of home was crushed.
– Station 5: Traveling to Circe’s Island — more farmer carrying and sandbag carrying until we reached the shop. We dropped the oars and had to then ascend the heights of hoffa. We devoured some food from Circe’s by doing another modified asian squat. Ran down the hill and we had to a bear crawl back to the shop since we had all turned into animals. Luckily, Odysseus tamed Circe and the men were returned to normal.
– Station 6: Circe’s island was a party and to celebrate almost 3 years of chilling, we went to the bars to hang for 3 minutes. The gods intervened though as our forearms were already destroyed by the farmer carry and we stayed for a mere minute.
We then picked up the supplies and oars, and made back for the starting point. With forearms beat, the PAX stopped this madness. Part II of the Odyssey themed workouts will pick-up with the Underworld.
Moleskine: Homer offers a tension between fame (kleos) and home (nostos). One of the great messages of Homer is Achilles in the underworld that basically says Home is the better path. In short, the moleskin was the following: CHOOSE HOME.
Tags: Mastodon, Stock boy, Too Big To Fail (TBTF), Toto, Cheap Shot, Mr Roboto, Dumpster, Samsonite, Bloomer, Treebeard, The wet burrito, Doogie
F3 Wheaton 