45 Caliber Workout

Present: Jolly, Tortuga, Aloha, Archive, Sparrow, Panda Express, Noodles, Bogo, Speedo, Drumline (FNG), Crack, Achtung, Beaker, Shiplap, Ranger Rick (FNG), Bloomer, Banks, Whittler, TBone, Babysitter.

Warmorama: Motivators, Abe Vigodas, Arm Circles (all in cadence)

The Thang: AMRAPs with 4 stations, equalling 45 reps at each station:

20 merkens, 5 pullups, 20 BBSU

15 swerkens, 20 dips, 10 Bonnie Hurleys

10 picnic press, 35 LBCs (in retrospect, 2 should have been one)


COT: As we have passed the summer solstice, we contemplated that as the days get shorter, this converges with John the Baptist’s signature saying, “I must decrease, He must increase.” In the second half of life it is less about us and more about others and God.

Prayers for Chicago, Haiti, Noodle’s M, Traveling PAX, and others.

We have drone coverage today courtesy of Sauron/Big Brother.


The PAX: @bloomer, @banks, @tortuga, @wetburrito, @binford, @TBTF, @Jolly, @bigmac @milkduds, @whittler, @aloha, @shiplap, @panhandle, @katniss, @davinci (Q)

Warmorama: Side straddle hops during Kook and the Gang’s Celebration with Burpee at the word “Celebrate.” Arm circles, Tappy taps, quad and calf stretch.

The Thang:

Run 100 yards, 10 merkens, 90 yards, 10 merkens, 80 yards, 10 merkens and so on.

Ultimate Frisbee with an added FutFall-inspired dimension (penalty burpees on interceptions).

Destroy your core (ab exercise of choice for 2 minutes)

Moleskin: “The wonderful Danish writer Isak Dinesen once suggested that there are three occasions for happiness in human life: when there is an excess of energy; during the cessation of pain; and when we possess absolute certainty that we are doing the will of God. The first of these belongs mostly to youth, and the second is, by definition, brief. The third, however, is open to anyone at any and all times.” (Robert Johnson, Balancing Heaven and Earth, p. 276)

COT: Prayers extemporaneous style, especially for the safe delivery of baby Babe.

Beer Suckers (Black Ops #1)

Six PAX (@Binford @Beaker @TBTF @Banks @Davinci @Jolly) showed up for the first Black Ops event of the summer, which involved a lollipop/sucker shaped ten mile run from Two Brothers brewery around McKee Marsh and back. The slow group’s lollipop was somewhat consumed as we only made it a third of the way around the marsh. Still, we all went basically ten miles.

Two of us may have suffered hotflashes after the workout. This may not have been wise, but it was clearly CSAUP (completely stupid and utterly pointless). Perhaps the next Black Ops should not be as grueling. Still, six of these (including any Black Diamond workouts) qualifies for a coveted end of summer prize. @Shiplap appeared at the brewery to show support, and somehow @Beaker managed to lead a Q the next morning at 5:30AM.

Jacques Q-steau

Jacques Cousteau sails again in new film | France | The Guardian

Warmorama to “Calypso” by John Denver (song about Jacques Cousteau), but the rain caused equipment malfunction.

The Thang: Run around A.O. led by Jacques Cousteau. When wildlife is spotted, at Jacques’ discretion an exercise is assigned to said animal (and remains on that animal for duration of workout). After Jacques called exercise Jacques status transfers to next PAX in line, who leads the group until he identifies the animal/exercise of his choice.

It was a nice way to see the full AO in the rain.

Moleskin: “Of course the festival of rain cannot be stopped, even in the city. The woman from the delicatessen scampers along the sidewalk with a newspaper over her head. The streets, suddenly washed, became transparent and alive, and the noise of traffic becomes a plashing of fountains. One would think that urban man in a rainstorm would have to take account of nature in its wetness and freshness, its baptism and its renewal.” -Thomas Merton, Rain and the Rhinoceros in Raids on the Unspeakable

COT: @Banks aka Jacques, @Katniss aka Jacques, @Panhandl aka Jacques, @Milkduds aka Jacques, @BigMac aka Jacques, @Tortuga aka Jacques, @DaVinci aka Jacques Q

Prayers for @Tortuga’s M & @Saga

Handrolled 90s Glory

A rosy-fingered dawn greeted the PAX who gathered for a beatdown set to 90s music, freshly imported from actual compact discs that were listened to in the 1990s.

Warmorama: Sidestraddle hops during Live’s “I Alone” with a burpee for “I Alone.” Arm circles, Daisy pickers and calf stretches.

The Thang: PAX choose two cards from the dexicon, do the exercise (number card = 30+, royal = 50, Ace + 100). After two cards completed, sprint to goal post, job 75% to the chair placed half way, jog the rest of the way. Repeat. The 90s glory kept drawing the runners back to the deck.

Moleskin: F3 talks about “the Warrior” (mentioned previously), so we discussed “the King” from Rohr’s From Wild Man to Wise Man:

The calm king sitting on his throne is the archetype of centeredness and security within himself. He is, therefore, a symbol of fertility and creativity within himself. To be in the king’s good graces is to be at the core. The king in a man is secure neough to recognize, affirm and bless goodness when he sees it inn others. he is not threatened by the growth or maturity of others, because he knows and loves who he himself is. You cannot threaten the king because he does not need you, or even need your admiration. He is the principle of healthy autonomy and very clear boundaries. the greater the king, the bigger the realm he is able to hold together. Some are kings for their own limited racial group, some hold together a “rainbow coalition,” others preside over the whole domain and hold it together in unity. Thus Christians rightly speak of Jesus as “King of kings” because his universal rain “falls on the good and bad, the just and the unjust.”

COT: Cooper, mothers, FIA sister group, Dr. Phil’s boro, Saga’s friend, Big Mac’s students.

NOR: (can anyone tell me what NOR means? I think it means people who showed): FNG: @Draper, @Banks, @SAGA, @Banks, @Beaker, @BigMac, @Katniss, @Shiplap, @Tortuga, @Panhandle, @Jolly, @DaVinci Q

Bonus: Summary of coffeteria discussion: We discussed the extreme stress of football coaching culture (and American work culture in general), the cost to families, and the sacrifices necessary for “greatness,” sacrifices that are often not worth it. Better a whole person perhaps than to give it all to exceed in one area.

Friday Ruck/Run Club

The PAX emerged at AO Ground Zero for a ruck club, with a few who could not handle the intensity of rucking opting for a run. Present were @noodles, @shamu, @panhandle, @T-bone, @tortuga, @SAGA, @cookies, @banks, @shiplap, @drphil, @tortuga, @jolly, @davinci (q)

Warmorama: Tappy Taps in cadence (done correctly).

COT: Prayers for @noodles interviews and for @banks travel.

Moleskin: One of the F3 books is subtitled “the unshackling of the modern day warrior.”

This language terrifies some who think it will endorse patriarchy, the unjust rule of men over women. It certainly can. But a better word for that is actually puer-archy, the rule of boys, for real men seek the flourishing of women. The answer to the wrong kind of warrior (“toxic masculinity”) is not the SNAG (“soft New Age guy”) but the mature warrior. One book puts it this way:

“If we are accessing the Warrior appropriately, we will be energetic, decisive, courageous, enduring, persevering, and loyal to some greater god beyond our own personal gain…. If we are accessing the Warrior in the right way, we will, at the same time that we are ‘detached,’ be warm, compassionate, appreciative, and generative. We will care for ourselves and others. We will fight good fights in order to make the world a better and more fulfilling place for everyone and everything. Our war-making will be for the creation of the new, the just, and the free” (95).

One of the authors of that book’s life ended tragically, which remains an important warning. Rohr has a good Christian version of the same material that I really enjoyed, but I personally think Robert Johnson’s He (including the follow up volumes She and We) are the real classics of the genre. In any case, stay tuned for upcoming service opportunities for “the creation of the new, the just, and the free.”

Descent into Hell: Holy Saturday Beatdown

Warmorama: Arm circles in cadence, Abe Vagoda in cadence, leg stretches OYO

Springsteen, “I’m going down” (Side straddle hops during song, merkens when The Boss says “I’m going down.”)

The thang: Around the school at each stairway climb 3x with a burpee at the top each time. At bottom do the listed exercise. 40 reps to signify the 40 days of Lent. (40 curls, coupon lunges, LBCs, overhead press, BBSU, derkens, tricep dips, bent rows, American haammers, crunchie frogs, thrusters, skull crushers). Reps are actually 4000 each (Christ did 3960, we do 40).

COT: Prayers for @noodles job, for our M’s


“In the mysteries of Isis, the Mysteries at Samothrace, the Mysteries at Eleusis, in all of those you had the descent into the underworld. The descent was both symbolic and real. Christ descended as well. What did Christ bring into the underworld that was different than what the earlier Mysteries had been able to do? It’s really quite a central question because something changed in the very nature of the underworld. Christ’s descent was not like an Orpheus or or others who have descended and then came back – Christ overcame. That reality is often not considered at all. It wasn’t just a pivot to the underworld, it was an overcoming and a changing of its nature forever.”   -Robert J. Faas

Hence, as men we need not be afraid of our depths.

NOR: @panhandle, @shiplap, @katniss, @bunson, @beaker, @SAGA, @sparrow, @jolly, @tortuga, @drphil, @noodles, @archive, @gummibear @davince Q

Hilltop coffeteria for the sunrise. It’s nearly Easter.

Groundhog Beatdown

@saga, @tortuga, @jolly, @cookies, @banks ,@crash, @shiplap, @bigmac, @panhandle, @DaVinci (Q) showed up for a Candlemas history lesson with a workout interspersed between speeches.

Warmorama: Arms and legs on your own during speech about the origin of Groundhog Day (Candlemas). Then Side straddle hops on the beat to Blinding Lights by The Weekend with Goofballs on the Chorus (note the theme of light).

Five stations set up with Candles around the AO (including sledding after last station, 20 burpee penalty for wipeout) where wisdom was ready by candlelight.

10 Pullups

Q Source, First Leadership Virtue: “He must have Candor, which is the Habit of graciously telling the hard truth and demanding to hear it from others.”

Desert Fathers: Abba Isidore said “Persons under instruction must love those who are their instructors like fathers and fear them like rulers, neither diminishing fear through love nor obscuring love through fear.”

20 Picnic Presses

Q Source, Second Leadership Virtue: “He must have Commitment, which is unwavering loyalty to the Group and unflinching determination to accomplish its long term (not short-term) Mission.”

Desert Fathers: Abba John said, “I never preferred my own advantage over my brother’s benefit.”

30 Derkens

Q Source, Third Leadership Virtue: “He must be Consistent, in that he is unchanging in nature, Standard or effect over time. In-Consistent Leaders cannot be fully relied upon and ultimately, they produce inconsistent results.”

Desert Fathers: Abba James said, “There is no need only of sayings, for there are many sayings… But there is need for action; that is what is sought, not sayings, which bear no fruit.”

40 Picnic Curls

Q Source, Fourth Leadership Virtue: “He must possess Contentment, which is the stability of emotion engendered by the consistent pursuit of Joy rather than happiness. Only a Contented man can abandon the pursuit of his own Personal Comfort. “

Desert Fathers: Abba Joseph said, “You cannot become a monk unless you become altogether like a flaming fire.”

50 Merkens

Q Source, Fifth Leadership Virtue: “He must be a man with Courage, which is the Habit of Setting aside fear to turn hardship into grace… The Virtuous Leader accepts fear as the natural and necessary human emotion and overcomes it thorough Preparedness and self-control.”

Desert Fathers: Abba Isaac said: “I never brought into my cell a grudge against a brother who had offended me and I endeavored not to let a brother go to his cell who had a grudge against me.”

Moleskin: At the end of the summer, John the Baptist is celebrated (“I must decrease, He must increase”) as the days decrease in length. Until, that is, the light of Christmas, when the days begin to increase. The candles, traditionally blessed at this time of year, symbolize the increasing light of Christ.

COT: Prayers for carrying other’s burdens, a podcast, decreasing ego and increasing light of Christ. During coffeeteria a man appeared to share with us that “most people go to God when they’re in the shit… thank him for beautiful days like this.”

BTW, Groundhog predicted more winter this morning. Enjoy it!

Journey of the Magi

11 PAX (@Tortuga, @T-Bone, @Beaker, @Noodles, @Big Mac, @Katniss, @Hotbox, @Shiplap, @Banks, @GummiBear, @Da Vinci Q) appeared like stars to combat the post-Christmas blues by celebrating Epiphany. We explored the magi as life exemplars. Wisdom came from splicing the sayings of the desert fathers with Q-source handbook, which helpfully modify ancient desert wisdom for our time and place:

WARMORAMA: Sidestraddle hops during Sufjan Stevens We Three Kings with arm circles during the chorus and leg stretches at the end.

Q-Source: “A man maintains Fitness for reasons outside of himself” (37)

The Thang: Coupon Hike around the lake.

LEG 1: Coupon curls as we walked. 20 burpees

John Colobos: “Humble mindedness and fear of God are superior to all virtues.”

Q Source: “Nothing good comes easily, nor should it, for it is what a man learns about himself during a difficult journey a makes him an Effective guide for those that come afterward.” (26)

LEG 2: Overhead press as we walked: 10 burpees

John Colobos: “Who is as strong as a lion? Yet a lion is falls into a snare because of its belly, and all its strength is brought low.”

Q Source: “The HIM is not an ascetic living in a monastery. He knows that while what he eats may often be outside of his control, how much he eats is always his responsibility.” (40).

LEG 3: Partner sprints for a star jump as other partner carries both: 20 burpees

Isaac of the Cells: “Do not bring children here. Four churches here have been deserted because of children.”

Q Source: “The seeds of discontent sown by the ineffective father will yield a legacy of damaged fruit” (54).

LEG 4: Walk with coupon: 10 burpees.

Repeat sequence at football field.

COT: For schools, Wheaton Bible church pastoral transition, our divided nation. Everything may be expected of us, but Christ gave everything for us. It is about more than the gifts we give to Christ (1st half of life), it is about receiving what he gives to us (second half of life).

Abba Isidore: “A life without a word is better than a word without life.”

Q Source: “A good boss will give you a clear job description so that you know what is expected of you. As a husband and father, you won’t need anything like that because everything is expected of you.” (63)

Gentile da Fabriano, Adoration of the Magi (1423)

2020 Ritual Burial

Tbone, Sparrow, Shiplap, Tortuga, Banks, Jolly, Big Mac, Noodles, Panhandle, Archive, Wet Burrito, Bloomer, Capn’ Crunch, Beaker, Cookies, TBTF, Catniss, Da Vince (Q) materialized for a December 8 ritual burial of the year 2020. Of course we dutifully split into two groups to maintain social distancing protocol.

Warm up: Arm circles and Abe Vagodas in Cadence

Newly invented exercise: Party Burpees (Side Straddle Hop during Party Rock, do a burpee every time you hear “Party Rock,” switch from Side Straddle Hops to Goofballs when you hear “hating is bad”, but keep doing the Burpees at Party Rock).

The Thang: Partner up, break up into two lines. One group runs up the hill, the other runs to the bleacher by the baseball diamond to catch a glimpse of hope for 2021. Meanwhile 2020 is put to rest. Partners perform the following sequence (while other partner runs). If you finish early, help another group finish their reps.

DIG THE GRAVE: 100 grave diggers


TEST THE TOMB: 300 derkens


Conclusion: Lie in corpse pose. Slowly rise to Bittersweet Symphony by the Verve. When beat commences, partners do 20 burpees and 21 burpees to spell 2021.

COT: We are all the way to Theta as we work through the sayings of the desert fathers. This time it’s a mother named Theodora: “As trees do not bear fruit if they do not undergo winter storms and rains, so for us this age is winter. We will not be able to inherit the Kingdom of Heaven other than through many afflictions and temptations.”