Backblast: Opening Day a la Cookies 04/03/2021 7:00AM @ AO MASTODON

Spring Training has finished, opening day had some goofy events:

  • first home run of the season was hit in the snow and the batter thought was a double

  • home run bouncing out of the fielder’s glove and yielding an out instead of 2 runs based on a base running rule

  • the Cubs had more runs than they had hits (and still lost)

But F3 has no off season. We have been getting out beatdowns all winter! The PAX came out in force and three FNGs (who will be posting mostly at other AOs, but we got to name them!)

WOR was a baseball classic to get us going:

  • High Knees

  • Butt Kicks

  • Karaoke

  • Frankensteins

  • Toe Touches

  • Lunge Twist

  • Arm Circles (with 2 baseballs in each hand) Palms Down Forward, Palms Up Backward

THANG:

5 stations on the baseball field. 9 innings, 5 minutes each, Q kept time and called out at the top of each inning. PAX distributed to the stations and did the exercise that goes with the active inning until fatigue. Then they would take a chance to throw a baseball to the net at home plate. If they hit the sides they would go to the station displayed, if they got it into the strike zone they would call Merkins (or Burpees if your name is SAGA) and everyone would stop to do 5 and go to the station of their choice.

1st Base

2nd Base

3rd Base

Left Field

Right Field

1

Squats

Side Lunges

BBSU

Flutter Kicks

One arm Rows

2

Star Jumps

Calf Raises

Crunchy Frogs

Supermans

Chest Press

3

Bonnie Blairs

Bear Crawl

100s

Am Hammers

Plank Pull Thru

4

Side Strad Hops

Burpees

Outlaws

Shoulder Taps

Curls

5

No Surrenders

Seal Jacks

Leg Raises

Manatees

Coupon Swings

6

Rev Lunges

MM Poopers

LBC

Plank Jacks

Skull Crushers

7

OH Clap Jacks

Pickle Pounders

Plank

Oblique LBC

High Pull

8

Monkey Hmprs

Walking Lunges

Mountain Climb

Reverse Plank

Overhead Press

9

Arm Circles

Imperial Walker

Plank High/Low

Supermans

Bent Over Rows

Before the 7th inning we took a stretch with a JOLLY for a double ten count.

We finished up with 20 penalty merkins for the 4 who never threw a strike.

NOR:

Captain Crunch, Crack, Crash, Cohiba, Cookies (Q), 3xFNG (Bob the Builder, Trout, Roxxy sp?), Jailbreak, Jazz Handz, SAGA, TBTF

Descent into Hell: Holy Saturday Beatdown

Warmorama: Arm circles in cadence, Abe Vagoda in cadence, leg stretches OYO

Springsteen, “I’m going down” (Side straddle hops during song, merkens when The Boss says “I’m going down.”)

The thang: Around the school at each stairway climb 3x with a burpee at the top each time. At bottom do the listed exercise. 40 reps to signify the 40 days of Lent. (40 curls, coupon lunges, LBCs, overhead press, BBSU, derkens, tricep dips, bent rows, American haammers, crunchie frogs, thrusters, skull crushers). Reps are actually 4000 each (Christ did 3960, we do 40).

COT: Prayers for @noodles job, for our M’s

Moleskin:

“In the mysteries of Isis, the Mysteries at Samothrace, the Mysteries at Eleusis, in all of those you had the descent into the underworld. The descent was both symbolic and real. Christ descended as well. What did Christ bring into the underworld that was different than what the earlier Mysteries had been able to do? It’s really quite a central question because something changed in the very nature of the underworld. Christ’s descent was not like an Orpheus or or others who have descended and then came back – Christ overcame. That reality is often not considered at all. It wasn’t just a pivot to the underworld, it was an overcoming and a changing of its nature forever.”   -Robert J. Faas

Hence, as men we need not be afraid of our depths.

NOR: @panhandle, @shiplap, @katniss, @bunson, @beaker, @SAGA, @sparrow, @jolly, @tortuga, @drphil, @noodles, @archive, @gummibear @davince Q

Hilltop coffeteria for the sunrise. It’s nearly Easter.

Run Club

Backblast, 4/2/21, 5:30AM, AO Ground Zero

Eleven PAX posted for this morning’s festivities. @Cookies, @DaVinci, and @Sparrow modified as needed and rucked to spare their knees and/or ankles.

The rest of us warmed up with a 1.4 mile jog over to the Blanchard Road hill, located next to Crossway Books. We ran the hill slowly the first time, made the return trip back down and did it again, increasing our speed each rep so that by the fifth ascent we were at an all out sprint.

Once hills were finished we sprinted the length of the island on Crescent Street that starts just east of the College Ave train station and goes to the end of the block. @Shiplap crushed us. (I think he might need to gain some of that weight back to slow him down a bit.)

The return trip got us back to the AO just after 6:15. We ended up just shy of 5 miles for the run.

NOR: (in alphabetical order) Beaker, Cheese, Cookies, Crack, DaVinci, Jolly, Katniss, Shiplap, Sparrow, T-Bone, Tortuga (Q)

COT: We prayed for T-Bone working to finish a deal with work, Crack and his work trip out east next week, for new believers Sparrow and his team witnessed to from Iran last week – for the strengthening of their faith, Sparrow whose feeling were hurt (not by @Jolly or anyone from F3, surprisingly).

Moleskin: Keep working on our verse of the week, and don’t leave the six behind: check in with your team and encourage/ push the stragglers to finish off the first part of Ephesians 2:8, “For by grace you have been saved through faith.” Next week we add the next chunk, “and this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God.”

4.1.21 BACKBLAST: “A Fool’s Errand” @ AO Mastodon

the jester and his court

After some pre-blast un-HCing among the PAX and thinking some tom foollery was going on behind his back (which indeed it was), SAGA waited in the shadows to make sure he would win as the ultimate fool. Seeing the PAX all gathered, he appeared as a light in the gloom and entered the AO as the Mastodon Jester dressed for April 1st. He cued up the beatdown soundtrack of Jesus Christ Superstar (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u3m2kQ-tOEk) and with a nod to it also being Maundy Thursday in Holy Week he invited the PAX to lay down their lives for their brothers (Maundy comes from the Latin word “command” & refers to Jesus’ commandment to the disciples to “Love one another as I have loved you”).

WOR: Motivators / Goofballs / Tappy Taps / Mt Climbers

THANG ONE: Cooties Cooties, I got my COVID shot

Two team relay: 1 PAX does 2 pull-ups while rest of PAX does squats and cycled through the team for 3 rounds to see which team won

50 shoulder taps to make sure the PAX are vaccinated (1-is-1)

50 merkins to make sure the vaccine worked

Mosey to…

THANG TWO: Carousel of Foolishness

Timed Challenge @ ball diamond—1st round: tried to beat other team / 2nd round: tried to beat their own team record + other team. Winning team time through the following was 3min 26sec…

1st = 25 merkins / 2nd = 25 burpees / 3rd = 25 squats / Home = 25 star jumps

Team in dugout switched between dips & planks (or whatever miscommunication SAGA had determined was appropriate in the moment).

When you want to get off but the carousel won’t stop: 25 merkins to remind you of your foolishness. Then, mosey to…

THANG THREE: “Remember, Philip, you’re going to die!” (legend has it that this is what King Philip’s jester told him every day he entered the court)

Teams started at lamppost at the base of Hoffa and ran over the bridge stopping at each lamppost until they reached the 8th lamppost: 5 burpees at first lamppost & then 10 squats at next lamppost – repeated same reps at following lampposts in same order. PAX were instructed to pick up the six on their team if they had completed everything (helped with reps to get them to the finish line)—first team to 8th lamppost won, except that we all die and so 25 more merkins + 50 LBCs + 25 burpees + race Tortuga back to the flags.

CoR/NoR/Cot:

13 PAX in attendance: Archive, Beaker, Captain Crunch, Cookies, Crack, Da Vinci, Hotbox, Jolly, SAGA (Q), Shiplap, Sparrow, T-Bone (respect), Tortuga (respect)

Moleskin: remember #sword-swallowers

“For by grace you have been saved through faith” – Eph 2:8

This famous quote from Jim Elliot’s October 28, 1949 journal entry, written the autumn after he graduated from Wheaton: “He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain that which he cannot lose.”

See his journal housed at Wheaton College @ https://www.facebook.com/WheatonCollegeGraduateAdmissions/posts/he-is-no-fool-who-gives-what-he-cannot-keep-to-gain-that-which-he-cannot-losethi/1901188219934907/

Whimsy will save the world—make sure in the seriousness you are also quick to play. The world needs laughter alongside the sorrow. Be good air for others to breathe...

3/27/2021 – The ABCs Revisited – AO Mastodon

Partly because he wasn’t feeling very clever, and partly because he enjoyed it so much the first time around, Crash decided that we would revisit a beatdown from last November on this bright morning. As the creator of the workout (and the Q’s father), YHC was excited to see what my 2.0 would do.
8 HIMs showed up, at least one of whom had just come from the “morning” beatdown at AO Tar Pit.

Warm-O-Rama:
Goofballs IC – 10
Tappy Taps IC – 10
Bat Wings IC – forward arm circles, backward arm circles, seal claps, OH claps 10ea.
Michael Phelps OYO while the Q described the “thang”

The ABC’s
1. Alligator Merkins across the base of Hoffa
2. Broad Jump Burpees back to starting position
3. Colt 45 – coupon curls, lower half, upper half, full – 15 reps of each, 45 total
4. Derkins – 25
5. El Capitan – Deep lunges up Hoffa, touching hands to ground
6. Foxholes at top of Hoffa – WWI sit up, roll to plank position, merkin, flapjack, repeato 25x

mosey back down to the base of Hoffa

7. Grave Diggers – coupon between legs, lift up to shoulder (like shoveling dirt), back to btw legs, flapjack, repeato 20x
8. Hand-release merkins – 25
9. Inch-worm bear crawl across the base of Hoffa
10. Jackhammers – jump squats
11. Knerkins – Chuck Norris merkins – 25
12. LBCs – 50

return to coupons at start position

13. Murder Bunnies – 25yds
14. No Surrenders – 25
15. Outlaws – leg circles – 25 each direction
16. Plank Jack’s – 50
17. Quiet – silent low plank 30 sec.
18. Ranger Merkins – 25
19. Star Jumps – 25
20. Thrusters – 25
21. Upright Rows – 25
22. V-Up Roll Ups – 25
23. Windshield Wipers – 25
24. X-Cross Sit Ups – 25
25. Yul Brynners – each rep consists of 1 of each of the following: Carolina Dry Dock, Wide Merkin, Merkin, Ranger Merkin, Diamond Merkin, Crucible Merkin, Knerkins – 5 total reps

Sadly, we ran out of time before reaching Z, so no zombie crawl up Hoffa like the first time.

COT: Crack, Rainbow Bright, Tortuga (respect), Double Beef ‘n’ Cheddar (hate), Cap’n Crunch, Too Big To Fail, Cheese, Crash (hate, Q)

3/29/21 Run/Ruck Club

11 PAX (Archive QIC, Crack, Shiplap, Beaker, Jail Break, TBTF, Tortuga, Captain Crunch, Cookies, Jolly, Da Vinci) for some miles under ruck or behind Tortuga.

6ish miles for the Run Clubbers. Ruck club:

W/Sandbag. 3x up Hoffa. Ruck to island. Sandbag holder + 2 runners go clockwise, one PAX farmers carrys two rucks counter clockwise. First to catch the Sandbag holder wins.

Finish up lap of AO- shuffle one lamppost/walk one lamppost back to the Flag.

COR NOR
Moleskine: Thoreau observed, “the cost of a thing is the amount of what I will call life which is required to be exchanged for it, immediately or in the long run.” F3 is the best thing I’ve ever purchased- no money exchanged and every ounce on time that I’ve put into it has been richly repaid with accountability, fellowship, and personal growth.

COT- Prayers for Tortuga’s M (sleep), Captain Crunch’s friend Katie recovering from a stroke during birth, and Beaker’s M traveling with kids in tow.

Backblast: Revised SuperDora 03/23/2021 5:30AM @ AO MASTODON

One month ago YHC attempted to create something Super, but as has been observed lately, this PAX never does anything half-assed. In this case it was not only too complicated, but also an insane quantity of reps that even the valiant baker’s dozen HIMs could not complete. Now, with the warmer weather, a new version of the SuperDora has emerged, and the PAX of F3-Wheaton were ready to meet the challenge: Banks, Beaker, Big Mac, Cookies (Q), Da Vinci, Hotbox, Jolly, Katniss, Panhandle, Saga, Shiplap, T-bone, Tortuga, Whittler

WOR: Daisy pickers and some leg stretching, Arm circles and some arm stretching.

THANG: SuperDora, revised version

Instead of pairs, the entire PAX was challenged to complete exercise reps including both cardio exercises and PT. Carry your coupon with you everywhere you go, and don’t linger at any one station too long. Exercise completion tracked by moving tokens from one bucket to another at 4 stations:

Station 1 – Hoffa: 50 tokens

1 Redrum up and down Hoffa per token

Station 2 – Cooties: 100 tokens

5 Pull ups or 10 Inverted rows or 10 Kettlebell swings or 10 Derkins per token

Station 3 – SHOP: 150 tokens

10 Curls or 10 Chest press or 10 Overhead press or 10 Tricep Extensions or 20 One arm rows or 5 Picnic table press per token

Station 4 – lamppost: 200 ‘tokens’

10 BBSUs or 10 Outlaws or 10 American Hammers or 5 Hodors per token

The PAX split up and got to work. It turns out that the Cooties and SHOP were very popular and all reps were finished before 6am, but there were plenty of Mary and Redrums still on the board to keep the PAX going to the end. With one Redrum token remaining and less than a minute left a beautiful Manrise rounded things out and the Q deemed the SuperDora complete!

Connect 4 Beat Down – Jolly 3/27/2021

15 Pax showed up on a beautiful Saturday morning at AO Tar Pit for a Connect 4 inspired beat down!

WOR: Motivators, Arm Circles, Michael Phelps, Tappy Taps, Quad Stretches.

The Thang

Once the Pax were warmed up and ready to go we headed over to the Tar Pit track. We did a schoolyard pick to spilt into two teams. Captains Shiplap (Red Team) and Big Mac (Black Team) carefully picked the Pax they would go to battle with. Not surprisingly, Tortuga was a top pick while Jolly was nice enough to let everyone else be selected before he committed to a team.

Now that the teams were picked it was time for the competition to begin! There were 8 stations spread out around the track. Each player would take a Connect 4 token with them as they made their way around the track completing all 8 exercises along the way.

Station 1 – 25 Merkins

Station 2 – 25 Lunges

Station 3 – 25 Big Boy Situps

Station 4 – 10 Burpees

Station 5 – 25 Merkins

Station 6 – 40 Squats

Station 7 – 25 American Hammers

Station 8 – 10 Burpees

Each time a Pax completed a lap they were able to play their Connect 4 token.

In addition, opposing team Pax could challenge each other in a race. One Pax would sprint a lap around the track while the other would complete 25 burpees. The first to complete the challenge would take the loser’s token and be able to play two tokens their next time around. Tortuga and Big Mac were the only ones to attempt the challenge. Not surprisingly, Big Mac easily won despite Tortuga putting up one of his fastest lap times.

Official records are unclear, but I believe Big Mac’s black team was the clear Connect 4 winner!

NOR: Archive, Beaker, Big Mac, DaVinci, Gummy Bear, Hotbox, Jolly, Katnis, Noodles, Panhandle, Saga, Shamu, Shiplap, Tortuga, Whittler

COT: Prayers for safe travels for Noodles, sleep for Tortuga’s M, reduction in Covid cases on campus.

3.24.2021 – This Goose Was Cooked (Martyr Q) @AO Tarpit

Warm-O-Rama

Early morning gloom, so early the sun hadn’t even posted yet, but 13 PAX had (well 12 had and SAGA would be joining shortly) (Babe, Panhandle, Shiplap, Banks, Whittler, Da Vinci, T-Bone, Gummi Bear, Noodles, Tortuga, SAGA, Katniss, Big Mac (QIC)).

Disclaimer (and Spoiler) Jan Hus found a cause worth dying for, an F3 morning workout is not worth dying for. Modify as necessary.

Warm-o-Rama:

Jan Hus – Born in the late 14th century. The exact year is disputed (sometime in the range of 1369-1375)

14 burpees

Born in Husinec, literally “Goosetown” from whence he received his surname.

10 Goose steps (like a tin soldier but elevate foot on ground to tip-toe)

Born into poverty to peasant parents,

10 lunges

Huss trained for the priesthood "I had thought to become a priest quickly in order to secure a good livelihood and dress and to be held in esteem by men."

10 good mornings

Committed to study hard

10 mountain climbers

Headed to Prague

Mosey to wheel

Earned his bachelors, masters and doctorate – 50 curls for bachelors run the hill, 50 bent over rows for masters run the hill, 50 overhead press for doctorate run the hill.

Along the way ordained- Rifle carry up and down the hill.

Encountered the writings of John Wycliffe, stirred interest in the Bible. "When the Lord gave me knowledge of Scriptures, I discharged that kind of stupidity from my foolish mind."

Preacher at Prague’s Bethlehem Chapel (Seats 3000) Preached in Czech not Latin

Mosey to the stadium and run the steps

Starts placing more emphasis on Bible, and more authority on church councils. Re: Bible "desiring to hold, believe, and assert whatever is contained in them as long as I have breath in me."

20 thrusters to lift up the Word of God.

Rift emerges, German and Bohemian sects, Two Popes vie for rule of Christendom

Murder bunnies to opposite ends, rifle carry back. It’s a race.

Everybody loses, both popes deposed. Church council elects Alexander V. Alexander bribed to side against Huss. Huss is branded a heretic and excommunicated. Excommunication only on paper.

Continues to preach.

20 thrusters to lift up the Word of God.

Antipope John XXIII replaces Alexander. Tries to raise money to conquer others vying for papal authority by selling indulgences. Huss is outraged.

10 Blockbees.

Speaks out and is excommunicated for real this time.

Mosey back to Wheel.

1414 – Council of Constance, Huss invited by Holy Roman Emperor, promised safe conduct and enticed by possibility of significant church reforms agreed to travel.

Two Laps around the wheel and then rifle carry to flag.

On arrival immediately arrested and asked to recant on views (papal authority is higher than protection of Roman emperor). No recanting, stops appealing to king, structures of medieval church or even the pope. He appeals to higher authority, Jesus Christ.

20 thrusters, uphold the Word of God.

He is buried in a mound of wood up to his neck. Asked one last time by Duke of Bavaria to recant beliefs.

"No, (said Huss;) I never preached any doctrine of an evil tendency; and what I taught with my lips I now seal with my blood.

20 thrusters

From Foxe’s Book of Martyrs "You are now going to burn a goose, (Huss signifying goose in the Bohemian language:) but in a century you will have a swan which you can neither roast nor boil." If he were prophetic, he must have meant Martin Luther, who shone about a hundred years after, and who had a swan for his arms.

Every account I’ve read has him singing hymns as he died in the flames.

Moleskin – There are many cries for justice these days. I’m not sure I could clearly state what the word means, but by listening to those crying out it seems to be a deep sense that all is not right in the world and a longing for something better. Perhaps the climax of Huss’s life is the point when he stops appealing to any earthly authority. All had let him down, the Bavarian King, the Roman Emperor, the Medieval Church and the Pope, all he has left is Christ, and it is to Christ he makes his final appeal. As Christians, we lament injustice, but it does not surprise us. Our hope is not in any of the institutions of earth but in Christ.

Prayer: Babe’s grandfather, T-bone’s M (medical procedure), Noodles for wisdom in job-related conversations.

Backblast for AO Mastodon 3/22/21: Ruck Club

QIC: Beaker

11 PAX gathered for run club/ruck club.

WAR

Motivators (x7 ic)

Quad stretching OYO

Tappy taps (x15)

Abe Vigodas (x10)

The Thang:

The run clubbers ran on the prairie path. The ruck clubbers rucked on the prairie path.

NOR

Run club: Archive, Banks, Shiplap, Tortuga, DaVinci, Whittler, Big Mac, Jolly

Ruck club: Babe, Jailbreak, Beaker

COT: We gave thanks for beautiful weather and bodies that work, we prayed for Captain Crunch’s friend’s wife and baby, Jazz Hands’ friend’s husband, and Sparrow’s trip to Armenia.