Sparrow’s Intro to Old Testament

This workout was designed so that someday, somewhere, a man would make an intelligent comment about the Old Testament, and get some raised eyebrows from those around him. “How would you know anything about that?” they ask incredulously. “Well, you see, I one time did this workout…

“Motivators”, which were actually side straddle hops.
Tap-y-Taps.
Calf stretches.
Mountain man poopers
etc.

The Creation of the Universe


1 In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth. The earth was without form and void, and darkness was over the face of the deep. And the Spirit of God was hovering over the face of the waters.


Hold Superman like you’re hovering over the face of the waters.
Progress to Al Gore
God makes man: Man Makers X 10

The Garden of Eden

Calf raises around the garden. Eye to eye with your fellow PAX, enjoying relationship and a non-stressful exercise. Pass an apple from PAX to PAX until somebody succumbs to temptation and bites the apple.

The Fall of Man

Saga bites the apple. All hell breaks loose. 10 burpees.

Noah’s Flood

Pax pair up and complete 100 merkins and 100 squats together, then choose an animal and do that crawl up the hill, two-by-two. Circle up at the top of the hill to form an ark, then do flutter kicks and leg raises. The ark lands on Mt. Ararat.

The Tower of Babel

“Come, let us build ourselves a city and a tower with its top in the heavens, … And the Lord came down to see the city and the tower… and there confuse their language, so that they may not understand one another’s speech.” PAX TOWER/Human Pyramid.

Call of Abraham

God calls Abraham to leave his home. Abraham follows God. Abraham believes God’s promise even though in his own lifetime he didn’t see all of it fulfilled. The promise was true, and Abraham became a mighty nation. AMRAP Big boy situps 2 Minutes.


We give Isaac a miss.

Jacob and Esau

Jacob grasped the heal, we do one set of pull ups, your personal max. God renamed Jacob into “Israel” Jacob had 12 sons, who became the 12 tribes of israel. One of them was Joseph.

Joseph and the Coat of many Colors

Chest presses while we learned that Joseph was enslaved by his brothers. God had a plan for Joseph to be the leader of Egypt, a savior of his people, and the training ground for all of that was slavery and prison. Joseph saved his family by storing up grain before the entire world got hit by a famine.

Slavery in Egypt

Joseph’s family (Israel and his sons) were saved by traveling to Egypt and getting fed, but eventually things took a turn for the worse. Pharaoh enslaved the Jews. They spent their time making bricks. The PAX did 20 grave diggers, then a rifle carry up hoffa.

Exodus: Let my people go

God gives Moses a special upbringing and leadership training, and then tells him to go talk to Pharaoh. Moses complains, but it turns out God was right. Moses tells Pharaoh that God says “let my people go.” During the 10 plagues, God told his people to paint their doorways with the blood of a lamb, so that the angel of death would pass over their house. That sounds strange, but Christians also believe that the blood of Jesus is also able to spare us from death. PAX do squat thrusters reminiscent of painting an overhead doorway.
After 10 plagues and the death of his son, Pharaoh lets them go.

10 commandments

God gives Moses the 10 commandments while they are in the desert. Pax do 10 block merkins (later in the workout).

Wandering in the wilderness

God’s people make it right up to the edge of the promised land, but they refused to obey God and go into it, so he told them they could wander for a while (40 years) while they thought about it. PAX go for a fast jog (a fog) with an emphasis on picking up the 6, which creates the sensation of wandering.

Promised Land

PAX enter the promised land and enjoy some much needed rest.

moleskin

The Old Testament is a beautifully written collection of history, poetry and prophecy. It tells the story of a God who desires relationship with us. If you find yourself asking “Why God?”, read the Old Testament and ask yourself “Why People?” People do some silly things, and God keeps moving towards us in relationship.

COT. Prayers.

Backblast – 5.17.2021 – Today was a Good Day

As we continue our FNG/Kotter drive, today proved to be another successful drive and PAX brought in 3 more FNGs. Per usual Ruckers remained and Runners ran like the wind.

WoR: Motivators x7, Abe Vigodas, x16, Tappy Taps x15

The Thang: Ruck/Shuffle/PT

PAX went on a ruck around the AO and stopped for the following PT stations:

Station #1 – Bolt 45s (15 squats down to halfway position and return. 15 squats from halfway down position to full squat position and return up to halfway position. 15 full squats or jump squats.
Station #2 – Dan Taylors x7 (1 squat, 4 lunges, 2 squats, 8 lunges, etc.)
Station #3 – 1 Round of ATMs (15 shoulder taps, 15 slow tempo merkins, 15 fast tempo merkins)
Station #4 – Bear Crawl Snake up Hoffa (Snake up Hoffa, PAX at the end weaves in and out to the top of the line, next PAX at end of the line begins crawl).

Plank for the 6.

Got a nice lather in for the day and encouraged some of the running PAX along the way.

NoR – .

CoT – Praise for Whittler’s recent engagement. May God continue to bless his relationship and plans for marriage. Praising God for F3 and the recent growth. Allow old and new PAX to recognize the benefits of this group. Allow us to continue planting seeds with other man that need F3 but don’t know it yet.

Backblast – 5.17.2021 – Today was a Good Day

As we continue our FNG/Kotter drive, today proved to be another successful drive and PAX brought in 3 more FNGs. Per usual Ruckers remained and Runners ran like the wind.

WoR: Motivators x7, Abe Vigodas, x16, Tappy Taps x15

The Thang: Ruck/Shuffle/PT

PAX went on a ruck around the AO and stopped for the following PT stations:

Station #1 – Bolt 45s (15 squats down to halfway position and return. 15 squats from halfway down position to full squat position and return up to halfway position. 15 full squats or jump squats.
Station #2 – Dan Taylors x7 (1 squat, 4 lunges, 2 squats, 8 lunges, etc.)
Station #3 – 1 Round of ATMs (15 shoulder taps,
Station #4 – Bear Crawl Snake up Hoffa

Plank for the 6.

Got a nice lather in for the day and encouraged some of the running PAX along the way.

NoR – .

CoT – Praise for Whittler’s recent engagement. May God continue to bless his relationship and plans for marriage. Praising God for F3 and the recent growth. Allow old and new PAX to recognize the benefits of this group. Allow us to continue planting seeds with other man that need F3 but don’t know it yet.

Capture the Bag

A fast paced, high-heart-rate role playing game with dedicated roles for runners and ruckers. 


If future pax are reading through backblasts looking for ideas, I recommend skipping this one. It was a lot of fun to plan, but would have worked better with a smaller field of play or about 20 more PAX. Regular capture the flag might be fun to try. If you need a visual cue to recognize who is one what team, I thought “hats vs heads” worked well.

For natural and healthy reasons, our Mondays are divided between ruckers and runners. But there is much that unites us, not the least of which is sweating with friends before the sun comes up.

A game was designed with the following goals

  1. Ruckers carry heavy things
  2. Runners gonna run
  3. Everyone sweats 

Before the game starts, each pax will choose a running or rucking role, and maintain that role for the entire game. 

Runners will be running throughout the game, unimpeded by weight or pain stations. 

Ruckers will be carrying their rucks and occasionally a sandbag. Runners cannot carry. 

The entire pax will be divided evenly into two teams, with the runners and ruckers split evenly between the teams. 

The AO is divided into two even halves, four bridges divide the territory. Islands belong to the Northern team.

All of our available sandbags will be divided evenly between the two teams, let’s say team had 2×60 pound sandbags. 

At the start of the game, the ruckers on each team will carry their sandbags away from the starting bridge all the way to the other end of the park. If all pax reach the other end, they earn one point (In hindsight, this was probably unneccessary. It did create a more traditional ruck feel, but used up most of the time that could have been spent playing the strategy game).

The ruckers are trying to defend their sandbags by moving them around  constantly or by stashing with partial visibility them within 12 feet of the outer track.  Each sandbag was given a “certificate of visibility,” which had to be visible. (in hindsight, we had more daylight than expected and slightly less visible sandbags would have been fine.)

When ruckers are on their home turf, they will be referred to as “defensive ruckers”.

When a Rucker leaves his home turf and crosses a bridge in search of the other team’s sand bags, he is acting as an offensive Rucker. 

The runners primary job is to gather intelligence for their team. Runners should be able to spot the location of stashed or moving sandbags and report it to their Rucker teammates. Stashed sandbags must always be visible from the outer track. Runners also have the ability to send an offensive pax to jail when he is discovered out of his home territory. Finally, runners can empty their own jail by running past and tagging it. (in hindsight, the runners mostly just ran.)

In order to steal a bag, the offensive team has to challenge the defensive team to an exercise. If there are more than 2 pax involved, the challenges take place man-to-man. If one team is outnumbered, their pax have to compete more than once. For this reason, numbers are an advantage.

In the end, Archive’s team was a strong contender, both in strategy and exercises. Sparrows team (hats), proved a competent defender. Each team stole one bag, defended one bag, and made it across the park, for a tie score of 3:3.

Welcome FNG “Babysitter”
Welcome back Kotter, “Picasso”

4/23/21 Town & Country Run Club

Be kind every man is fighting a hard battle aphorism.

10 Pax for a Town & Country run (Archive QIC, Banks, Shiplap, Tortuga, Whittler, Shamu, Dr. Phil, Hotbox, Panhandle, TBone). Route was as follows: Town: east on Prairie Path to Parking Garage. To the top of the garage. North past library. West on Lincoln to Prairie Path. North on Prairie Path. West through the Marsh to overpass. East on Childs to startex.

COR NOR BOM: Prayers for Boomer and Cooper, giving thanks for wonderful surroundings to run in.

Moleskine: “Be kind for every man is fighting a hard battle”

Distance Dora

Backblast, 4/10/21, AO Tarpit, 5:30 AM

Twelve brave PAX came out on an overcast warm morning for a beatdown at AO Tarpit.  After a quick WOR of walking arm circles and Michael Phelps, high knees skips, grapevines and a short mosey, we partnered up at the track.

Thang one: Distance Dora

B.I.B.L.E.

Broad Jump Burpees

Inchworm

Bear Crawl

Lunges

Ephesians 2:8

Partner one ran a lap around the track while partner two made his way around the track doing Broad jump Burpees.  Flapjack: partner two ran, partner one did broad jump burpees.

We repeated this pattern with Inchworm, Bear crawl, and then Lunges.  Once partner two finished his run after his lunges, both partners walked together while reciting Ephesians 2:8 – “For by grace you have been saved through faith, and this is not your own doing, it is the gift of God.”

Repeated as time allowed.

Thang two

  1. Round 1: Using three pull up options at the playground we split into three teams.  One person completed six side pull ups while the rest of the PAX completed slow merkins IC. We rotated through the pull ups twice.
  2. Round 2: Just four pull ups, first person at your station to get 50 merkins OYO ended the round.

Mary

Back at the flag.  We completed 25 flutter kicks IC, then 22 more with PAX calling out the verse, Eph 2:8, in place of the count.  One, two, three, By, one, two, three, grace, One, two, three, you, One, two, three, have, One, two, three, been, One, two, three, saved, etc.

NOR: Archive, Banks, Big Mac, DaVinci, Jolly, Katniss, Noodles, Panhandle, Saga, Shiplap, Tortuga (Q), Whittler.

COT: We lifted up Whittler who has an exam on Monday that he is continuing to study for this weekend, Noodles and his continued job search, and Saga who has some training today and a difficult classroom situation that will be coming to a head soon.

Moleskin: One way to think about grace is as God’s Riches At Christ’s Expense.  By grace we have been saved.  We have been adopted as God’s sons and been made co-heirs with Christ through nothing more than the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ.  It was given freely, at a great cost.  And it was not plan B.  Earlier in Ephesians it says that we were “chosen in him before the foundation of the world.”  Christ’s sacrifice to purchase our salvation was Plan A.  This is the God we serve.  Let’s live into that reality.

Good work on the verse, fellas.  Keep it up.

Nerf 2: Electric Boogalo – The Hunt for Wet Burrito.

Warm 0 Rama

Warmup involving high rep block thrusters to surprise everyone who thought this would be easy.


Dodge Ball

Pax split into two teams. To start the game, everyone completes 20 Merkins before making a run for the dodge balls. 3 Squats are required before each throw. When you get out you have to run the perimeter of the tennis courts and then plank till that game ends.
Tortuga suprised us by having a vast knowledge of obscure dodgeball variants. We tried several of his variations.

Bears Vs Crabs

Pax are divide into uneven teams based on their preference for crab walking or bear crawling. Slightly more pax prefer bear crawls. The bears dominate every game, despite a number of rule variations designed to give the crabs an equal opportunity (no hands, hands, goalie rules, etc).

Nerf 2: Electric Boogalo – The Hunt for Wet Burrito.

David and Goliath, with nerf guns. Pax split into two teams. A challenger steps out from his team and challenges the other team to an exercise, naming his rep count (Let’s say, 50 squats). A defender steps out from his team and accepts the challenge on behalf of the whole team. Although the two pax are engaging in representative combat, all PAX present will do the exercise stated. When the first representative warrior reaches the target rep count, he picks up a nerf gun and fires on the other team. When the second representative reaches the target rep count, he also picks up a nerf gun and tries to shoot the attacker. The fighting ceases when either of two things happen: The attacker gets shot, or one of the other pax finishes the reps and runs to the top of the hill, proclaiming freedom for the captives.

Moleskin

Life doesn’t always go the way you planned, but when I shot that guy in the neck, life was good.

Backblast: Revised SuperDora 03/23/2021 5:30AM @ AO MASTODON

One month ago YHC attempted to create something Super, but as has been observed lately, this PAX never does anything half-assed. In this case it was not only too complicated, but also an insane quantity of reps that even the valiant baker’s dozen HIMs could not complete. Now, with the warmer weather, a new version of the SuperDora has emerged, and the PAX of F3-Wheaton were ready to meet the challenge: Banks, Beaker, Big Mac, Cookies (Q), Da Vinci, Hotbox, Jolly, Katniss, Panhandle, Saga, Shiplap, T-bone, Tortuga, Whittler

WOR: Daisy pickers and some leg stretching, Arm circles and some arm stretching.

THANG: SuperDora, revised version

Instead of pairs, the entire PAX was challenged to complete exercise reps including both cardio exercises and PT. Carry your coupon with you everywhere you go, and don’t linger at any one station too long. Exercise completion tracked by moving tokens from one bucket to another at 4 stations:

Station 1 – Hoffa: 50 tokens

1 Redrum up and down Hoffa per token

Station 2 – Cooties: 100 tokens

5 Pull ups or 10 Inverted rows or 10 Kettlebell swings or 10 Derkins per token

Station 3 – SHOP: 150 tokens

10 Curls or 10 Chest press or 10 Overhead press or 10 Tricep Extensions or 20 One arm rows or 5 Picnic table press per token

Station 4 – lamppost: 200 ‘tokens’

10 BBSUs or 10 Outlaws or 10 American Hammers or 5 Hodors per token

The PAX split up and got to work. It turns out that the Cooties and SHOP were very popular and all reps were finished before 6am, but there were plenty of Mary and Redrums still on the board to keep the PAX going to the end. With one Redrum token remaining and less than a minute left a beautiful Manrise rounded things out and the Q deemed the SuperDora complete!

3.24.2021 – This Goose Was Cooked (Martyr Q) @AO Tarpit

Warm-O-Rama

Early morning gloom, so early the sun hadn’t even posted yet, but 13 PAX had (well 12 had and SAGA would be joining shortly) (Babe, Panhandle, Shiplap, Banks, Whittler, Da Vinci, T-Bone, Gummi Bear, Noodles, Tortuga, SAGA, Katniss, Big Mac (QIC)).

Disclaimer (and Spoiler) Jan Hus found a cause worth dying for, an F3 morning workout is not worth dying for. Modify as necessary.

Warm-o-Rama:

Jan Hus – Born in the late 14th century. The exact year is disputed (sometime in the range of 1369-1375)

14 burpees

Born in Husinec, literally “Goosetown” from whence he received his surname.

10 Goose steps (like a tin soldier but elevate foot on ground to tip-toe)

Born into poverty to peasant parents,

10 lunges

Huss trained for the priesthood "I had thought to become a priest quickly in order to secure a good livelihood and dress and to be held in esteem by men."

10 good mornings

Committed to study hard

10 mountain climbers

Headed to Prague

Mosey to wheel

Earned his bachelors, masters and doctorate – 50 curls for bachelors run the hill, 50 bent over rows for masters run the hill, 50 overhead press for doctorate run the hill.

Along the way ordained- Rifle carry up and down the hill.

Encountered the writings of John Wycliffe, stirred interest in the Bible. "When the Lord gave me knowledge of Scriptures, I discharged that kind of stupidity from my foolish mind."

Preacher at Prague’s Bethlehem Chapel (Seats 3000) Preached in Czech not Latin

Mosey to the stadium and run the steps

Starts placing more emphasis on Bible, and more authority on church councils. Re: Bible "desiring to hold, believe, and assert whatever is contained in them as long as I have breath in me."

20 thrusters to lift up the Word of God.

Rift emerges, German and Bohemian sects, Two Popes vie for rule of Christendom

Murder bunnies to opposite ends, rifle carry back. It’s a race.

Everybody loses, both popes deposed. Church council elects Alexander V. Alexander bribed to side against Huss. Huss is branded a heretic and excommunicated. Excommunication only on paper.

Continues to preach.

20 thrusters to lift up the Word of God.

Antipope John XXIII replaces Alexander. Tries to raise money to conquer others vying for papal authority by selling indulgences. Huss is outraged.

10 Blockbees.

Speaks out and is excommunicated for real this time.

Mosey back to Wheel.

1414 – Council of Constance, Huss invited by Holy Roman Emperor, promised safe conduct and enticed by possibility of significant church reforms agreed to travel.

Two Laps around the wheel and then rifle carry to flag.

On arrival immediately arrested and asked to recant on views (papal authority is higher than protection of Roman emperor). No recanting, stops appealing to king, structures of medieval church or even the pope. He appeals to higher authority, Jesus Christ.

20 thrusters, uphold the Word of God.

He is buried in a mound of wood up to his neck. Asked one last time by Duke of Bavaria to recant beliefs.

"No, (said Huss;) I never preached any doctrine of an evil tendency; and what I taught with my lips I now seal with my blood.

20 thrusters

From Foxe’s Book of Martyrs "You are now going to burn a goose, (Huss signifying goose in the Bohemian language:) but in a century you will have a swan which you can neither roast nor boil." If he were prophetic, he must have meant Martin Luther, who shone about a hundred years after, and who had a swan for his arms.

Every account I’ve read has him singing hymns as he died in the flames.

Moleskin – There are many cries for justice these days. I’m not sure I could clearly state what the word means, but by listening to those crying out it seems to be a deep sense that all is not right in the world and a longing for something better. Perhaps the climax of Huss’s life is the point when he stops appealing to any earthly authority. All had let him down, the Bavarian King, the Roman Emperor, the Medieval Church and the Pope, all he has left is Christ, and it is to Christ he makes his final appeal. As Christians, we lament injustice, but it does not surprise us. Our hope is not in any of the institutions of earth but in Christ.

Prayer: Babe’s grandfather, T-bone’s M (medical procedure), Noodles for wisdom in job-related conversations.

Dueling Doomsday Clocks

Backblast, Tuesday, 2/9/21, 5:30 AM, AO Mastodon

It was definitely a Shackleton today. As I arrived at 5:21, the parking lots had not yet been plowed, but a plow was hard at work. By 5:26, I was able to pull into a plowed spot by the tennis courts. The plow was still clearing the rest of the lot as other PAX pulled in. The driver commented, “I thought you were a gang or something.”

WOR: motivators, tappy taps, goof balls, jog to cooties.

Thang one:

Two stations, teams of three. Station One: pull ups and jump squats. Station Two: Bulgarian Split Squats and SSH. The team member at each station stayed in motion doing the first exercise switching exercises as needed. Third team member ran around the obelisk circle to station one. Members rotated through the stations. (Continued this until QIC finished his 50 strict pull ups.)

PAX were encouraged to recite James while at stations. I think we got through verse eight a few times.

Thang two: Dueling Doomsday Clocks, part one

Moseyed back to the tennis court lot. Two groups for Dueling Doomsday Clocks. Each group formed a circle. At the start signal, each PAX got into the plank position. One PAX did one merkin and returned to the plank, then the PAX on his right did one merkin and returned to the plank, after all PAX in the clock did one merkin, the starting PAX did two merkins, etc. Once a PAX was unable to hold the plank or complete the merkins, he was out of the clock and began doing squats. As soon as one group was down to two remaining PAX, the round ended. One group got up to 10 merkins.

Thang three: Dueling Doomsday Clocks, part two

Moseyed to the pool lot. Repeated clocks with new groups and flipped the script. Clocks started in the squat position. First PAX did one squat, then returned to the squat hold with arms above the head. Eliminated PAX planked. (I was the first out on my team.) We had to call it a tie as time ran out.

NOR: Saga, Banks, Davinci, Whittler, Shiplap, Sparrow, Katniss, Beaker, Big Mac, Jolly, Cookies, Crack, and Tortuga (Q)

COT: Lifted up Hot Box’s M, TBTF with a rough work schedule this week, and Bloomer and Captain Crunch’s 2.0s.

Sparrow sang the praises of hand warmers and made an altar call (forgiveness and salvation being even better news than hand warmers).